By Volante blogger Taylor Poro
Halloween is less than a week away, but how can college students have fun during what is decidedly a children’s holiday? Halloween can still be enjoyable for those whose beards make trick or treating impossible. The trick is creativity, planning and not caring what people think about you.
First of all, who says that 18, 19, or even 23 is too old to go trick or treating? It’s free candy and veiled blackmail (unless your tricks are just empty threats) given out by people who obviously don’t understand the concept of bartering. Trick or treating can still be done as long as candy is more important than dignity.
Try dressing up as a very tall kid. The costume involves gear from the local high school, pins from whatever is hip and happening with the young people and an external costume so it doesn’t look like the tall kid isn’t wearing a costume. Shaving is also a must, because nothing says opportunistic college kid like a full beard. This goes for trick or treaters without Y chromosomes as well.
If that doesn’t work, try trotting out a young sibling as an excuse to go trick or treating. Kids have to be good for something, right? Free candy is just about the only reason to have kids or put up with siblings.
For those who don’t want free candy, there are always Halloween pranks. The purpose here is to find a group of people that deserves to be pranked. Nothing makes a person seem like a bigger jerk than tormenting an unsuspecting person for no reason. If you’re going to hassle people, choose those that deserve it.
“Twilight” fans are always a good choice to hassle because it’s actually quite scary. Nothing livens up a boring Halloween more than finding a pile of hate letters and death threats in your mailbox because you claimed “Twilight” fans aren’t smart enough to be considered people. The fear subsides quickly though considering the letters are written with sparkly glitter ink and each “i” is dotted with a heart.
The campus jerks are also a good target. If eggs are to be thrown (and history shows that they must), target the jerk that holds up the line because he’s on the phone, or the guy that plays loud music in his room at 3 a.m. on a Tuesday. Never go after the nice guy, karma sucks.
Dressing up is a must for the holiday, but as what? The pre-packaged costumes from Wal-Mart seem to come in two categories, insulting and slutty. Maybe I’m getting old, but who wants to see a slutty brick house? Then there are the “nerd” costumes and “trailer park king costumes.” Maybe it’s not the best idea to make costumes out of a sizable chunk of your consumer base.
Try buying costume supplies from Civic Council which has a much larger supply of items to choose from. As for costume ideas, too many costumes these days are unoriginal. Slutty Dorothy, sugar daddy — OK, we get it. Make a costume that no one could reasonably figure out without being told. The Doppler Effect, as shown on “Big Bang Theory” or a favorite character from a movie or television show no one has ever heard of. Being recognizable is for N00Bs.
As for entertainment, there are a variety of options on campus this weekend. The monster bash, which is being held in Julian Brookman lounge Oct. 30, will have good music, food, prizes and costume contests. There are also a number of great movies playing. “Zombieland” will still be in theaters (if not here than Sioux Falls or Sioux City, Iowa) as will “Where the Wild Things Are,” and “Paranormal Activity.”
These are a number of ways to enjoy Halloween as a college student. These aren’t the only ways though, do whatever seems fun interesting but not felonious. A funeral might make a good event too and everyone can come to mine after the “Twilight” fans read this and carryout their sparkly terrorism.
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The domestication of a feminist
Tags: cooking, dinner, Italy, travel
By Volante Opinion Editor Heather Fluit
It took me 20 years to learn how to be a mediocre cook. Growing up, I subsisted on a steady diet of Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Old Dutch Dill Pickle chips. Even when I played volleyball or basketball, my eating habits resembled more of a garbage disposal than a healthy, balanced human being.
At USD, I was spoon-fed (well, force-fed if you consider the required costs of on-campus meal plans) mass-produced food. I had zero motivation to drag my meager cooking utensils down to the oft-disgusting common kitchen to make a pot of overcooked spaghetti. I could have just walked to the Commons for that.
However, my very first apartment changed my appreciation of cooking — and, not to mention, made me less apt to think that if I cook, I am giving in to “The Man.” My first kitchen was about the size of a small closet and I shared it with three other people. In fact, I think it might actually have been a closet at one point in time. The doorway, which I’m convinced was designed with short people in mind, was even adorned with an unfortunate looking beaded curtain. It was an apartment in Florence, Italy, where I studied for a semester. I had a mildly functional gas burner, a small dented pot, a lukewarm refrigerator and leftover spices and olive oil from the former tenants.
I was mortified. I was convinced I would either starve from my lack of cooking ability, or rather, my lack of ability to order food in Italian. One of the two was going to do me in.
I started slowly, trying to work with the cards I’d been dealt. Spaghetti with tomato sauce was my first attempt at feeding myself. It was sufficient, though an embarrassing substitution for the authentic Italian cuisine down the street.
As the months wore on and I eventually returned home, I changed. I am not yet a “good” cook. No, not even close. Creative and resourceful, maybe. But, good? Not by a long shot.
What had changed was my perception of cooking, of caretaking. The ability to bring together family and friends around a table is not about the food, it’s merely the incentive. The power of cooking and a few plates of food was something that was lost on me until I learned that cooking isn’t about eating. It’s not about sustenance. It’s not about being domestic and subservient for the greater good of one’s family.
Cooking can lead to conversation starters, dinners, laughter and relationships. For many, it’s not about domesticity. It’s about learning to appreciate the draw of a home cooked meal.